Various Things That I Thought Were Cool

So… this…

Is just about the coolest thing of all time. Finally! All of my nerdy dreams are coming true! They have a laser that can shoot down a missile, next thing you know this technology is going to be mounted on an Ds-1 Orbital Battle Station, pointed directly at the peaceful planet of Alderaan. So let’s do our best to keep this technology out of the hands of the Empire- I mean Iran.


So, apparently, Obama doesn’t do his own tweeting. I have to say, I feel betrayed, all this time I’ve been following him, thinking I had a special connection to the president. LIES. Although, I suppose I should have known, I thought it was a little suspicious that he kept tweeting quotes from the State of the Union Address while he was giving it.

Anyways, apparently he’s looking for a new tweeter, and I’d like to make this my formal application for the job. I’ve even included a few samples of possible tweets from the president:

ObamaLogo1.jpgBarackObama OMG lyk srsly letz git #healthcarereform trending. RT plz.


ObamaLogo1.jpg

BarackObama Got spammed by some trolls/fiscal conservatives. You guys need to back off with the hate.

ObamaLogo1.jpg

BarackObama Oh NOEZ! teh nashunal debt iz up 2 $12.3 tril. #gotsomesplainintodo.

I guess he also has an entire new media department. Really? You mean people are getting paid to go on Facebook? And not just one person, no, it takes an entire department full of people to maintain the president’s Facebook account. I think I’m headed down the wrong career path.


Lastly, this story piqued my interest for two reasons. Firstly, I was fascinated to learn they have these things called “payphones” that are apparently just like cell phones that are attached to a booth-like device, sitting around randomly on sidewalks and stuff, that you have to pay to use. Who knew?

But what was really interesting was the scenario I imagine this poor reporter had to go through to get this story. Basically, I imagine he stood on a sidewalk, outside a courthouse, in Queens for 36 hours. He probably went home occasionally, but in the scenario in my mind, I like to imagine that he stayed there the full day and a half, nonstop. So, he’s waiting for someone to use this payphone, which I imagine didn’t happen a whole lot because it’s a payphone and it’s 2010, but then, after someone used the payphone, this reporter had to walk up and try to interview them about the reasons and situations surrounding their payphone usage. As much fun as that sounds, I think I’ll stick with being Obama’s personal tweeter, thanks.

My Superbowl Letdown

Probably the thing that I was most looking forward to talking about this week was that big controversy over the Tim Tebow Anti-Abortion Superbowl ad.

The endless internal war from the liberals between free speech and civil rights finally comes to a head when the pro-lifers fork out the dough and convince millions of women to change their evil and heathenish ways.

Or… not, that’s cool too.

When the subject of the controversy finally aired, and then I watched it on YouTube three hours later, I was completely underwhelmed. Sure, it had all the cheesy, fake, family-oriented, vomit-inducing factors of a conservative trying to sell me something, but what was the product? The ad was for a website, www.focusonthefamily.com, which I went to, just out of curiosity. After perusing the site for about ten minutes, I found the word “pray” in bold a few too many times for my liking, but other than that, I couldn’t find anything more than not-so-subtle Christian bias telling me not to have an abortion.

So I’m trying to figure out who won in this situation. I want to say it’s a pro-lifer fail, because they didn’t convince me of anything. But on the other hand, they didn’t attempt to encourage anyone to overturn Roe v. Wade either, or try overly hard to change my religion. Plus, there was a group that did try to get the commercial banned, which I am so not ok with.

So, I’m going to go with a pro-choice: fail on this one. Weird, I know. Well, I suppose you don’t know, but that is not at all like me.

A Rambling, Fragmented, and Somewhat Off-Topic Introduction

I know it's going to come out eventually, so I'm just going to say it: I spend about 45% of my waking hours on YouTube. So, when I was pressed to come up with an ongoing topic for this blog for English class, that was my first thought. Actually, that's a lie. I lie kind of a lot, sorry about that; don't worry, you'll get used to it. My first reaction was to blog Lord of the Rings, however, that's not exactly an ongoing topic that is very current, unless I want to read them yet again, and I just did that a few months ago.


Anyways, YouTube, right. The things I really enjoy watching on YouTube are channels like sXePhil, AngryFilmsProductions, and DavisFleetwood, in which these people comment- hilariously, I might add- on what is going on in the news. I’ve always been interested in the news, probably because growing up, we only got one channel on our TV, and that channel aired news for about 10 hours a day. So, as a child, I was generally better informed about current events than most adults I cared to talk to. Unfortunately, when I came to college, I stopped watching TV and found the joys of high-speed Internet, which provides all of the entertainment and none of that boring important stuff.

Getting back on topic, my next thought was to blog about what I was watching on YouTube every week, but I can't really see anyone being interested in that but me and other Jory Caron fangirls, and let's just face it, the fangirl crowd is kind of socially awkward and I don't want to hang out with them.

So then I thought, "Well, if I can't write about watching the great YouTube social commentators, why don't I just copy them?" So that's exactly what I'm going to do. For the duration of this sentence, I mean, blog assignment, I’m going to attempt to keep up with the current events going on every week, and add them to into the blender of my mind, along with 2 parts trying-too-hard humor, 3 parts of my own biased opinion, 1 part irony, 1 part self-deprecation, a pinch of apocalyptic doom, blend until only slightly chunky, and serve to you, in the form of what my English teacher calls an op-ed piece. My youthful idealism hopes it goes down smooth, but the pragmatist in me knows better than that.

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